Epilogue

Holiest Engagement

«At least you are my intimate friend, so I won’t deceive you. You can believe Me. I promise.» How shamelessly Krsna expressed Himself! He has come so intensely to plead for Himself, for our benefit. A record is kept in Srimad Bhagavad-gita for our guidance. Even more than that Krsna Himself came as Mahaprabhu in order to preach for Himself. He came as His own canvasser with a group and brought Srimati Radharani along with Him: «If necessary I shall show how charming a position you can have in Devotional Service. I shall show you how service can be so beautiful and dignified. Come along with Me.»

Baladeva came as Nityananda to canvass. Krsna and Balarama came to canvass for Themselves as Mahaprabhu and Nityananda. Vrdnavana came to canvass for itself as Nabadwip.

We are more indebted to the canvasser than the actual party. We are connected more intimately and we are thankful to the canvasser first, especially when the Lord Himself has come to canvass. How beautiful, how magnanimous, how sacrificing! What sort of Love Divine is found there!

We came to seek something good, and Mahaprabhu posed the direction. I became somewhat charmed there, and I felt, «Yes, this is very charming, very beautiful, and very capturing.» Then I searched for one who could distribute such things of satisfaction to my inner heart, and somehow I found my Master. He is canvassing exclusively for Mahaprabhu, and very strongly – surcharged with infinite energy to work and account of Sri Gauranga. With such intensity was that great dynamo! Then I accepted him and tried to offer myself to be taken within his shelter. I led my life following his order as much as I could, and now also I find that I am still under his shelter and doing some sort of duty as asked and ordered by him. In this way I am passing my days trying to have the core of his advice from the different Scriptures such as the Srimad Bhagavad-gita and Srimad- Bhagavatam, and trying to find the culmination of what Mahaprabhu and our Gurudeva expressed. With deeper and deeper thinking, I gradually receive some satisfaction. If I were to not say that I am getting satisfaction then I would be doing some injustice to Gurudeva and his associates. No other ideas of proposals can draw my attention. Rather, I am gaining firmer faith day by day in the teachings of Mahaprabhu, Vyasadeva, the Vraja-lila, etc. Though Their Nature is infinite, I find Their position is becoming stronger within me, and I must be satisfied with what little I can get. At the same time I feel in my good faith that this sort of life must be extended to others also. Thus I am passing my days.

By distributing Mahaprabhu’s message we are not going out to do anything bad but according to our conception we are trying to do the holiest thing. Our purpose is of the holiest type ever possible to conceive, so we must go forward with this program to do good for others, the best for others, and at the same time to get it for ourselves. There can be no engagement more holy than this in the world. It is the holiest engagement and has the blessings of the Lords Nityananda and Sri Gauranga. It is duty to Them. It is Their department.

Preaching is the special department of Sri Guaranga and Nityananda Prabhu. Nabadwip Dham is the place of Their blessings. Our prayer to Them is that, absolving us of all offences, They may utilize us. Here in Koladwip, Nabadwip, at the place of forgiveness of all offences, aparadha-bhanjan-pat, we are praying that They may forgive us for all our previous offences and engage us in Their service to spread Krsna consciousness together with Gauranga consciousness.

śrīmach-chaitanya-sārasvata-maṭhavara-udgīta-kīrtir jaya-śrīṁ
bibhrat sambhāti gaṅgā-taṭa-nikaṭa-navadvīpa-kolādri-rāje
yatra śrī-gaura-sārasvata-mata-niratā-gaura-gāthā gṛṇanti
nityaṁ rūpānuga śrī-kṛtamati-guru-gaurāṅga-rādhā-jitāśā

«On the banks of the Ganges in Koladwip, Nabadwip, Sri Chaitanya Saraswat Math stands resplendent. The flag flies high, singing its glories around the world. There, the residents chant the glories of Lord Gauranga and aspire to serve Sri Sri Radha-Govinda in the line of Sri Rupa.»

SRI RUPA MANJARI PADA

Composed by Srila Narottama Dasa Thakura

With comentary by Srila Guru Maharaj
(Srila Bhakti Raksak Sridhar Dev-Goswami Maharaj)

śri-rūpa-mañjarī-pada sei mora sampada
sei mora bhajana-pūjana
sei mora prāṇa-dhana sei mora ābharaṇa
sei mora jīvanera jīvana

sei mora rasa-nidhi sei mora vāñchhā-siddhi
sei mora vedera dharama
sei vrata, sei tapa, sei mora mantra-japa
sei mora dharama-karama

anukūla habe vidhi se-pade ha-ibe siddhi
nirakhiba e dui nayane
se rūpa-mādhurī-rāśi prāṇa-kuvalaya-śaśī
praphullita habe niśi-dine

tuyā adarśana-ahi garale jārala dehi
cira-dina tāpita jīvana
hā hā rūpa kara dayā deha more pada-chhāyā
narottama la-ila śaraṇa

Sri-rupa-mañjari-pada, sei mora sampada, sei mora bhajana-pujana - my everything is Sri Rupa Goswami's Holy Feet. We are to discuss so many classifications and positions of Rasa: Santa, Dasya, Sakhya, Vatsalya, Madhura. And in Madhura-rasa Srimati Radharani's camp is special. Then again there are so many gradations of Sakhis. There is also the class of the Mañjaris, the younger girls, and they have more freedom to approach. When Radha and Govinda are in union in a private environment, the Mañjaris can still approach; they have such freedom to visit Them. If any materials of service are necessary, the Sakhis send the Mañjaris to that place. The Sakhis do not approach there. In that way the Mañjaris enjoy the best confidence. The most secret service of Both can be supplied through the Mañjaris. In the highest position they have free entrance, and their leader is Rupa Mañjari. She is understood to be the leader of the whole group of younger girls, the Mañjaris, therefore in Madhura-bhajan she is all- in-all. This has been taught to us by Srila Narottama Das Thakura. For us - and the younger batch - she is our highest resort.

Sei mora sampada - my wealth is there in her feet. Sei mora bhajana- pujana - my worship and service is also in her. Sei mora prana-dhana, sei mora abharana - the very wealth and gist of my life is there; and the ornaments of my life, if any there may be, are within her Grace. Sei mora jivanera jivana - indeed, the very life of my life, if there is anything, that is also her. I am for her pleasure.

Sei mora rasa-nidhi - if there is anything, the source of any and all desirable ecstasy is only to be found there. The mine, source, and fountainhead of all Rasa is there in her feet. Sei mora vañcha-siddhi - and if I am to expect any other fulfilment in life, that is also there in her feet. Sei mora vedera dharama - if any duty is recommended by the Vedas for me, I would like such duty to be at her feet.

Sei vrata, sei tapa – if at all there is any desired fruit from any penance or observance of vows, that is also to be found there - sei mora mantra-japa - and the continuous repetition of japa all ends there. All things have only one end in my case: they all meet in different phases in the feet of Rupa Mañjari. If she is satisfied then the variegated nature of my devotional practices are satisfied. Sei mora dharama-karama - and any of my conceptions of duty or activity of any phases or form all have one end and meet in one point: the holy feet of Rupa Mañjari.

Anukala ha'be viddhi, se-pade ha'be siddhi - I only pray to the Controller who is at the root of all these arrangements of affairs in this world, "Please connect me there. O Absolute Manager, may you grant my prayer that all my tendencies may go to attain her favour." Nirakhibo e dui nayane - and my vision of her will be so very intense and concrete as though I am seeing with these very eyes. It will not be vague, abstract, or imagination, but it will be the most concrete realisation by the grace of the Absolute Manager.

Se rupa-madhuri-rasi, prana-kuvalaya-sasi - what sort of high-class beauty is there in her holy feet! I want to jump. Let my heart be a lotus.

There are two classes of lotus: the white lotus came from the sun and the red from the moon. The kuvalaya is a mixture of the two. The lustre of her body will feed me day and night as the life of my life which is compared to a kuvalaya. The kuvalaya is fed and nourished by the lustre of the moon, and her holy feet are the moon, and my very vitality is likened to the lotus. May the lustre of her beauty maintain and nourish my heart of hearts. Praphullita habe nisi-dine - and the lotus of my heart will grow by that ray, and dance.

Tuwa adarsana-ahi - this is my prayer, but what is my present condition? My present condition is in the negative side, my Mistress. My present position is such that without having a sight of you, Your Grace, my heart will burn into ashes. That is my present position. Garale jaralo dehi - this is just like the poison of a cobra which produces pain within my heart. I have been bitten by a snake, and what is that snake? It is the snake of your separation. I am not getting any direct contact with you, Your Grace. The serpent's poison has captured my heart and I am going to die. Ciro-dina tapita jivana - and this is not a sudden thing, but from the beginning I have been suffering this sort of pain of separation from such a beautiful and hopeful life of fulfilment.

Ha ha rupa koro doya, deho more pada-chaya, narottama loilo sarana - but I have now reached the extreme position and for the last time I am begging for your favour, otherwise I am going to be finished.

This was composed by Narottama Das Thakura in praise of Srila Rupa Goswami. In this way he has given us light of the higher quarter of bhajan life. Our sampradaya is named as the Rupanuga-sampradaya, and our Guru-parampara and all these things are adjusted according to that. He wrote many songs and they are of very substantive firmament, very ecstatic, and of deep faith.